Stop the Press I want to get off.

Scoop of the year from the Belfast Telegraph. Tony O’Reilly must be over the moon with this story.

Football legend’s ‘lost’ car is found and brought home

The words “fuck”, “flying” and “who gives a” spring to mind.

Is this what passes for journalism in Northern Ireland now that the ‘troubles’ are over?

A car bought in 2002 is going to be a tourist attraction in Northern Ireland? Are we fucking serious here?

I love this line: “The late football legend’s black Mini Cooper – the last car he owned before falling fatally ill – will eventually become part of a permanent exhibition dedicated to Northern Ireland sporting heroes.”

The car also, and I quote, “Mysteriously disappeared”. Ooohhh, spooky, do you think George or his brute ugly talentless waste of space son might have sold it? Nothing mysterious about that.

Roll up! Roll up! come and see a car bought by a man who was too drunk to drive it.

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