Estate agents are all scumbags

One of my favourite books which has served me well is Gulliver’s Travels. The book is divided up into four sections, most childrens versions of the book only deals with the first two, Lilliput, where Lemual is a giant among little people and Brobdingnag, where Gulliver is the tiny person among giants.

Section three deals with a series of wild and wacky islands where he meets immortal blind people, scientists trying to build houses from the top down and trying to extract sunshine from cucumbers etc.

 Chapter four, my personal favourite and in my opinion, the most important chapter of the book, deals with Lemuels travels to the island of the Houyhnhnms, a breed of talking horses where man is the savage. Amusingly, Dean Swift calls the savage man Yahoo cos they run around shouting yahoo all the time. Today people just think it is a second rate search engine.

In this chapter, Gulliver wants to explain the ways of England, the culture, the politics, why men wear clothes, why gems are coveted. When explaining laws, the Houyhnhnms ask Gulliver to explain the need for lawyers and barristers, Gulliver explains that everyone needs to be tried for crimes, the horse asks further questions as to why someone is employed to defend a person who has done wrong and defending the thing that isn’t.

Gulliver goes mad because he cannot competently explain the need for lawyers.

I am going mad because estate agents and their devious, coniving, rat like ways. I am starting to believe that estate agents are moulded out of the devils faeces. Example, I have viewed houses which are within my price range say £175,000. I go along, very nice house, the estate agent then tells me that the person does not want to sell for less than £200,000 and the original price of £175,000 was there just to get people through the door viewing it. So I have taken half a day off work, travelled thirty miles to see a house which I believed to be in my price range only to be told that it isn’t. I have asked estate agents on the phone before booking a viewing what they will sell it for and they tell me and they say the asking price. I go along and it is a different story.

There are two well known estate agents operating from the Belfast area which price their houses twenty grand less than the desired selling price just to get people through the door and I am seriously tempted to name and shame them on this. They literally are scumbags.

When I sell my car, I do not put it in auto trader for £200 pound less than I want do I? When I go to Tesco, I do not expect the shop assistant to tell me that there’s an extra couple of pounds on a bag of potatoes because what I thought they were priced at was just the viewing price. I fully understand that people bid on houses and it is technically an auction but to price something £20,000 less than what you want for it, is quite frankly, insulting.

P.s I really have no idea why I linked Gulliver’s Travels to this post?


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